Well, I decided to try acupuncture again. Not sure why, just feel like I need to do something and be proactive. I just can't accept that my eggs aren't any good and that egg donor is my only option. So Friday I went back to the first doctor I saw after pregnancy loss #3. He is closer to my house and cheaper. My sister-in-law had a co-worker use him after she had 3 losses and he helped her carry to term so I figured it was worth another shot. I loved my last acupuncturist Robert but he is about 45min away and since I work from home and have Kayla now it would be too much for me to drive all the way out there.
So I went and saw Dr. Yau on Friday. I explained to him that I have had 7 losses and he looked at me and said, "why haven't you come to see me sooner?" He examined me and said I had a very weak pulse and that I was carrying a lot of heat. Not sure that that means exactly but he told me to eat papaya, stay away from the sweets (which I LOVE), and eat spicy food in moderation. We are going to work on strengthening my reproductive system with acupuncture and herbs. He placed the needles in me and prepared 4 days worth of "tea" for me to take home. I go back Tuesday for another appt. Thank God I do because I can not handle this so called "tea." It is the nastiest thing I have ever tasted in my life and it takes 1 hour and 10 min to prepare every single day! Not to mention the fact that it makes my house stink! There is a pill form and although it isn't as effective as the tea I am going to have to insist we stop the tea and move forward with that. I don't have time to make the tea everyday and the taste is just so horrible I get depressed just thinking about when I have to take my next dose.
The tea is literally a bag of herbs that I boil in a pot for 10 min, then I steep it and put the herbs back in and boil them again in 3 cups of water for 30min, then I steep again, and repeat step 2 again for another 30 min. Then I have to divide it into 3 portions and drink it 3 times a day. IT IS AWFUL! I have gagged when I get some of the sediments at the end. I ended up making a batch Friday and 1 batch today but I had to throw away the other 2 days worth. I do want to carry a pregnancy to term but I guess I have my limits. I will gladly take the pill form so hopefully that will help me balance out my body and get it ready to carry a pregnancy to term.
So, do I think this is going to work? I don't know. I've done the acupuncture route before and it didn't but I guess I feel I just need to try Dr. Yau again. I've also started doing my morning cleansing tonics using the juicer. I read about it in The Fertile Female by Julia Indichova and if all else fails at least I will be very balanced and very healthy right?
I wish someone could tell me the right combination to get me to where I want to be. I know God doesn't negotiate but I have prayed to Him over and over again. "Please just let me carry one pregnancy to term and give birth to a healthy baby and I promise I will NEVER ask for this again." I really want Kayla to have a little brother or sister and I have always wanted at least 2 kids.
Maybe I need to let this go, maybe I'm crazy, but I just can't give up yet. So much for letting go and letting God. I'm trying but man it is so hard to just let this go. I'm not one to just throw in the towel when things get tough.